Posted on 2/28/2001

Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Lupin/Snape

Summary: Snape needs to take a walk with a friend.

Distribution: List archives

Feedback: Go for it.

Author's note/Disclaimer: I posted this once on Snape Slash, but have since re-worked it a little and hopefully made it better.

These aren't my boys. But if they were, they'd have a lot more fun!

Snape spent endless nights in his lab; alone down in the dark dungeons with shadows and whispers. He kept to himself. There were times he would have sold his soul to have someone to take a walk with. Just having someone beside him that he could call a friend would have fulfilled that aching need that he felt tonight. Yes, tonight was one of those nights.

"Damn it!" spat Snape. He had spilled some of the organic potion he was working on. Once again his thoughts were straying when he wanted to get his work done. He tried again to delve into the potion recipe before him.

He heard a noise. Snape looked up with a start. "Who's there?" No response. "Show yourself!"

Lupin out stepped from the shadows that surrounded the looming doorway leading into Snape's lair.

"For god's sake, Snape, it's only me. What the hell are you doing here at this hour?"

"Go away," replied Snape curtly.

"What are you doing down here all by yourself? Come on out, now, and let's hit the kitchen. I'm hungry."

"Go away," groused Snape again.

Lupin came into the dank lab and sat on a stool next to Snape. He looked at him for quite a while, watching him work; watching that dark, erotic face, handsome and intense.

"What's going on, Severus?" asked Lupin almost in a whisper.

"Go A-"

"What is going on?" repeated Lupin emphasizing each word.

Snape sighed deeply, stopped working and stared down at the simmering caldron. He looked up at Lupin slowly and their eyes met. There was weariness in Snape's eyes.

"I'm tired. Let's take a walk." Said Snape. He spoke in a whisper. It was the kind of whisper heard at funerals, thought Lupin and he sensed despair and loneliness.

"Sure, let's go."

Lupin and Snape walked silently up twisting stairs. Using a secret passageway (behind the portrait of an old goofy-looking wizard), they emerged directly into the cold night, bypassing mulling students and the caretaker's neurotic cat.

Side by side they walked through the immense yard of the castle in complete silence. The silence between these two men, however, was not awkward. The silence was almost comforting. "How could it be anything but?" thought Lupin. They were special friends. Although their friendship was guarded, there was always passion simmering just beneath the surface.

As they walked towards the lake and under the shadowy willows Snape slowed and stopped. The two men stood there in silence, side by side. As Snape stared across the rippling lake, he finally spoke:

"I have so many regrets. So many wasted years. When friends have reached out to me and I've always turned my back. I've handled the whole damned mess wrong." Snape finished this blunt statement shaking his head in disgust.

Lupin, quite taken back by Snape's candor stared open-mouthed at his friend for a moment before responding.

"Severus," Lupin proceeded carefully, "the things you have said in the past, the things you have done, the things you've felt...they are all what make you what you are today. The good and the bad of it."

Lupin paused for a moment before gently adding, "I, personally, would not change a thing."

Snape snorted, then looked over at Lupin. Lupin, however, was quite serious. And it showed on his solemn face.

"Explain to me your secret." Said Snape. "Explain to me how you do it. How everyone trusts you so easily. How everyone loves you without question. How everyone wants to be near you and hear you talk and watch you move and hear you breath. How everyone..." Snape trailed off.

"Everyone?" queried Lupin, eyebrows lifted in half-amusement.

"How everyone wants to...how I want to..." Snape tried to continue, but he could not.

Lupin looked at Snape's tortured face. Snape stared back at the lake. Lupin knew how hard it was for Snape to be this open and this vulnerable.

As Snape continued to stare into the lake Lupin reached up and stroked his friend's hair; smoothing it.

"So much pain..." spoke Lupin softly.

Lupin traced the lines on Snape's face begging him with him mind that Snape meet his gaze. Snape stared straight ahead, fighting not to lose control; not to let his aching need betray him.

"Let me show you" murmured Lupin as he touched.

Snape still stared ahead, knowing he was losing this fight. Lupin knew it, too, so he continued to touch and trace, moving his mouth closer to Snape's strong handsome face.

Lupin put his mouth next to Snape's ear and repeated; breathing hot breath onto Snape's cheek: "Let me show you."

The intimate closeness netted a single sharp intake of breath. Snape gasped, feeling the heat and the need. Lupin's hands moved to Snape's waist and snaked up to the vast chest pressing firmly. They caressed nipples that proved hard through the silken fabric of Snape's robes. Snape's breath quickened.

Snape turned and grabbed Lupin by the hair on the back of his head and pulled Lupin's mouth to his, kissing him hungrily. Lupin enveloped Snape's body with hard, muscular arms and held him close to him, feeling his hardness through straining fabric.

They continued gasping and kissing, pulling and tugging at each other; each desperately trying to get closer to the other. They were grinding at each other, both breathless and eager. Lupin was so overcome by the heat and the passion, while pressed up tightly against Snape he came, peaking, with a harsh shudder. He was quite unprepared for how intensely and how quickly it happened.

Panting, Lupin stared back at Snape in wonder. But passion was far from over. Lupin pulled Snape tight against him again. As Lupin kissed trails away from Snape's mouth and kissed down his jaw line, Snape almost screamed in ecstasy when Lupin bit down on his neck.

"Oh, God! Oh, I...I..."

"Tell me what you want, Severus," breathed Lupin hotly in Snape's ear.

Snape's strangled answer was one that Lupin would never forget: "Show me more."

Nodding knowingly, Lupin, trying to calm his own breathing, slowly began to undress Severus Snape. Snape let him.

As the night air hit Snape's naked skin, his body tensed. He was losing control for sure, now. It was almost more than he could bear.

"Please!" Snape hissed at Lupin.

"Patience, friend" said Lupin.

As Snape stood there, under the shadowy expanse of the willows, Lupin circled around him, fingernails scratching a light trail on naked trembling shoulders. When Lupin was behind his lover, he dropped silently to his knees. He placed his mouth so close to Snape's behind that Snape could feel the hot breath teasing him there.

Lupin slowly began to caress that lovely butt. Lupin licked and gripped that taunt flesh turning an otherwise distant and aloof professor into a trembling first-year, begging for more. Probing and tasting, Lupin could feel Snape begin to tremble.

"Turn around," coached Lupin softly.

Snape turned and as he did Lupin instantly engulfed Snape's throbbing penis with his mouth. Taking all of him in, Lupin growled sending vibrations from his talented throat straight into Snape's very soul. Snape fingers were by now tangled in Lupin's hair. Snape's head was tilted straight back, mouth open in a silent scream. Lupin continued.

"My God, Remus..." stuttered Snape. Lupin continued with greater fervor than ever before. When Snape looked down at that beautiful man ministering to his needs with such unleashed, unabashed passion, it was all he could take.

Snape came hard screaming Lupin's name. He stood under that vast weeping willow, hands gripping the shoulders of his lover, and nearly collapsed as his orgasm overtook him. Rocking his very soul.

Shaking, Snape folded up almost like an accordion, collapsing to his knees. Lupin moved, kneeling down beside Snape and held him, rocking him silently.

Lupin reached lovingly to touch his lover's face. He spoke softly into Snape's ear, "You have such a great capacity for passion. A passion of which I can barely fathom."

Snape leaned his head on Lupin, unable to respond.

"You have no idea how much you mean to me," continued Lupin.

Snape was too shaken to even smile an acknowledgment. Lupin released him and lay down on the grass and patted his chest beckoning Snape to rest his head there and sleep. As Snape nestled into that safe haven he had so long yearned for, he finally felt complete. He had not felt this for a very long time.

He was no longer alone.

No longer angry with his enemies.

No longer regretful of his past.

No longer afraid of his future.

-Fin.